How to Stay Upbeat (Positivity Breeds Positivity)

This is the second time in my adult life I've been unemployed (the first was after 9/11). In both cases, I've learned that it's imperative to get past the "misery" of being unemployed, and to celebrate the things to still be thankful for.

Mind you, this doesn't mean "accepting" or -- worse yet -- celebrating unemployment. It does mean that it's important to enjoy the rest of life; even if it means just taking your mind off the situation.

So - the first time I was unemployed, I hid. I hibernated and became reclusive, and spent nearly no time 'living' -- instead, I just looked for work; as many hours a day as I was able. Eventually, I was able to see past my own misery -- I started doing things with friends again; created my boardgaming group, and -- lo and behold -- two months later, I was gainfully employed.

This time around, I vowed to not fall into the same trap. I try hard to stay upbeat. Each time I send out a resume, I think to myself that *this* could be the job I'll eventually get. Sometimes I get the call; sometimes I don't. I try very hard to stay optimistic and positive, in hopes that my positivity will lead to something good.

And, I make it a point to do more things with friends -- including, shockingly (for those who know me) -- even reconnecting with friends from high school and fellow job-seekers; as I know that my conviction to 'continue living' only enhances my chance of landing a position.

However, this also puts an unfair amount of 'pressure' on those around me. For example, I look more forward to my interactions with friends than I normally would -- since that's a release for me. And, sometimes, those plans don't happen. And, in this case, being married is a double-edged sword. Yes, my wife is almost certainly the single-biggest support system I could ask for; yet, my very unemployment is clearly the source of an awful lot of unhappiness in her/our lives, and I'm aware that, it's something that *I* have caused.

For example, earlier today, she observed, not altogether whimsically; but not despondent either, that -- since we've been married -- her/our lives have been one piece of bad news after another -- I've been laid off twice; she's nearly died three times; we found we were unable to have children; we looked/are looking into adoption (but, advertising takes money -- money we don't have -- so, consequently, our window of opportunity is ever-so-slowly dwindling there, as well).

So, it can be difficult to stay upbeat -- several of my unmarried friends are envious of me, since I have such a fervent supporter; but, simultaneously, each day is a reminder of the impact my unemployment takes on our lives. We're (thankfully) not at the point where we're unable to pay bills, etc.; but we're certainly on more of an austerity budget - we don't just "go to the movies" or "go out to eat," etc...

But I try not to let it get me down -- and, I'm still confident (perhaps foolishly so) that I'll land something any day now... Positivity breeds positivity.